Fun Facts About Australia

This fun facts about Australia page doesn't contain anything serious, just a bit of fun which, perhaps, might give our foreign visitors an insight into the rather 'different' Australian sense of humor.



Australia was actually Britain's first attempt at a penal colony. What isn't mentioned is that they stopped using it once they discovered that it was a lot cheaper to ship people off to Ireland and just steal their potatoes until the Irish got so depressed that they emigrated to America and became crooked cops.

Australia was originally a British penal colony for exiled thieves and murderers. It is not to be confused with France, which was originally a British penal colony for the cowardly and annoying.

Australia eventually outgrew its shady past and evolved into a modern civilized nation, France has yet to make that particular leap.

The basic units of Australian currency are giant cans of beer, which explains why Australian men have gargantuan arm muscles.

The central portion of Australia is a dry, barren wasteland containing nothing of interest. Think of it as the real-world equivalent of a soap opera.

The Prime Minister of Australia is Kevin Rudd, and not, as most Americans assume, the late Steve Irwin.

Australians are strong, loyal, trustworthy, and fierce fighters. If for some unimaginable reason you don't own a gun, consider carrying an Australian instead.

The following fun facts about Australia are from Lonely Planet’s Australia:

You’re Safe in Their Hands.

Australia has almost 112,600 Surf Life Savers, who collectively spend some 1.4 million hours patrolling Australian beaches, where they rescue approximately 10,000 people per year.

Fun facts about Australia: Sports.

Aussie Tug of War.

Wooli (pop. 600) hosts the Australian Goanna Pulling Championships over Easter. Rather than ripping the eponymous animal to shreds, participants squatting on all fours, attach leather harnesses to their heads and engage in cranial tug-of-war. This sport was all the rage in the 19th century, until it was replaced in popularity by sheep worrying and dunny dodging.

Note: if you don’t know what a goanna or a dunny is you haven’t lived, not in Oz at least. .

Fun facts about Australia: Patents.

Great Australian inventions include the half-car-half-truck utility vehicle, (known in Oz as a ‘ute’, every ‘bloke’ should own one), the bionic ear, the black box flight recorder, the notepad and, my very own favourite, the wine cask ( may The Almighty forever bless this man ).

Fun facts about Australia: Food.

The Australian fetish for meat pies is legendary: Australians eat 260 million of them a year, around 13 per citizen. (and ain’t they good......sometimes).

Fun facts about Australia: The Cane Toad.

Queenslanders have several nicknames, but perhaps the most curious one is ‘cane toad’, after the amphibious critters that were introduced to Australia in 1935 in an attempt to control the native cane beetle.

These creatures are not a pretty sight and have proved to be absolutely useless as they ignored the pesky cane grub and instead focused on reproducing.

From an original batch of just 101 toads, there are now over 200 million of these long-legged creatures hopping around Australia- an invasion that has seen the populations of native snakes and goanna lizards decline.

Indeed, the problem has gotten so bad that a millionare pub owner has introduced a beer-for-a-bag-of-toads bounty that’s even got the support of the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals.

But it seems not everyone hates them; Queensland’s representative rugby league team (the best in the world) has chosen the cane toad as their unofficial mascot and they have even been listed by the National Trust of Queensland as a state icon, warts and all.

Unusual Zoo.

Even if you don’t normally like zoos, you must visit the Australia Zoo.

This isn’t your typical zoo- the animals aren’t in cages; instead they roam through semi-natural habitats spread over acres, many of which you can walk directly through.

This zoo is the life’s work and great love of the late Steve Irwin.

Profits from the zoo help endangered species and fund an on-site wildlife hospital.

Just be careful when you’re wandering through the crocodile enclosure... .

Fun facts about Australia: The Great Barrier Reef.

The Great Barrier Reef is home to about 1500 species of fish, 400 types of coral, 4000 breeds of clams and other molluscs, 800 echinoderms, including sea cucumbers, 500 varieties of seaweed, 200 bird species, 1500 different sponges, and 6 types of turtle.

Fun facts about Australia: Souvenirs.

If you’re looking to do more than simply soak up the sun on your travels there are a number of ways you can leave your mark on the environment- in a good way.

The Tolga Bat Hospital, located just outside Atherton near Cairns, is always looking for volunteers to help look after the hundreds of bats that they rescue, rehabilitate and release every year.

The winged critters are surprising cute and work might include feeding the ‘bubs’ or looking after orphaned flying foxes.

Fun facts about Australia: Yellow Gold.

Prized for its rich golden hue, rot-resistant oils and fine grain, Tasmania’s Huon Pine is one of the slowest-growing and longest-living trees on the planet.

Individuals can take 2000 years to reach 30m in height and live to be 3000 years old.

Fun facts about Australia: Doo Town.

No one is really sure how it all started, but the raggedy collection of fishing shacks at Doo Town all contain the word “Doo” in their names.

There’s the sexy “Doo Me”, the approving “We Doo”, the Beatle-esque “Love Me Doo”, and the melancholic “Doo Write”.

We’re a funny lot, us Aussies.

Beer Can Regatta.

Don’t miss this cheerfully odd event held in mid-July at Darwin’s Mindil Beach, featuring races for boats made entirely from beer cans.

Getting the building material can be a lot of fun.. .

Fun facts about Australia: Prince Leonard’s Land.

If you thought Australia was an island nation, you would be incorrect.

The Principality of Hutt River is Australia’s “second largest country” formed when Leonard Casley, appalled by new government quotas on wheat production, seceded from the Commonwealth in 1970.

The principality has around 13,000 citizens and is constitutionally valid.

It has a post office and gift shop and welcomes visitors.

PS you don’t need a passport to visit.

Staircase to the Moon.

The reflections of the rising full moon hitting the rippled mud flats at Roebuck Bay in Western Australia, exposed at low tide, create the optical illusion of a golden stairway leading to the moon.

The town is abuzz with everyone eager to see the spectacle.

At Town Beach there’s a lively evening market with food stalls and people bring their fold-up chairs and a bottle of something.

NB The original says ‘a bottle of something’ but the writer has obviously never been to Oz, no-one ever takes just ONE bottle...

No part of Australia is more than 1000 km from the ocean and a beach.

(The point in the world that's the furthest from any ocean would be in China.)

Australia has the world's largest cattle station (ranch).
At 30,028 km2 it is almost the same size as Belgium.

Australia is so big and sparsely populated that population density in Australia is usually calculated in square km per person, not people per square km.

Australians have 380,000 square metres per person available, yet well over 90 of Australia's GDP) cover 0.02% of Australia's land mass.

More land is occupied by pubs. (Can't find any statistics on the GDP here, my guess is: substantial).

In 1954 Bob Hawke made it into the Guinness Book of Records: he sculled 2.5 pints of beer in 11 seconds.

Bob Hawke went on to become the Prime Minister of Australia.

Says a lot for our politicians....

Funny stories:

Who do you think was more scared? The Australian family camping in Kakadu National Park who woke up when a three metre crocodile tried climbing up on their tent, or the crocodile, when the family started screaming

The poor croc turned straight around and raced back towards the water, unfortunately overlooking the tree in its way.

The tree lost a fair bit of bark and there were two big wet circles where the croc's nose had slammed into the tree...

Another.

A tourist from New South Wales had to stop another vehicle to ask for directions to Ayers Rock.

Nothing strange or funny about that?

Well, Ayers Rock is huge (348 metres high), is the only significant feature along the only road in the area, and he was right in front of the rock with his headlights shining on it!

You'd think you'd notice, wouldn't you?

Nope.

He pulled over the next car coming along, to ask for directions.

The car looked like a ranger's vehicle to him.

Well, they were cops instead and they immediately whipped out their breathalyser... 0.116.

Too bad... (if you don’t know, 0.05 is the legal limit for driving in Australia and if you drive with more alcohol in you than that you’re a bloody idiot...).

Fun Facts About Australia: Animals.

Rabbits are considered a pest in Australia. Although somewhat cute and fuzzy, they tend to wander the country in packs, destroying everything in sight, and pooping everywhere with no respect for property rights, much like American hippies.

There are 1500 hundred species of Australian spiders.

If you read about our spiders you might not like this: the average person swallows three spiders a year.

We have over 6000 species of flies, about 4000 species of ants, and there are about 350 species of termites in Australia.

The combined mass of all termites in the world is more than ten times the mass of all people.

Termites are also called white ants, but they're not ants, in fact not even closely related to ants.

Dingoes are wild dogs native to Australia, and shouldn't be confused with Ding-Dongs, which have less hair, and more cream filling.

A platypus is an odd-looking creature that appears to be a cross between a duck and a beaver. They live primarily in water and only exist to confuse biologists.

Australia has the world's largest population of wild camels with one hump.

The Tasmanian Devil does exist, it has the jaw strength of a crocodile and you can see it at Australia Zoo.

Sharks are immune to all known diseases.

There are more than 150 million sheep in Australia, and only some 20 million people.

Fun Facts About Australia: Geography.

Imagine if the fully welded rails of the Ghan train track weren't restrained properly, on a hot outback desert day they would expand and at the Darwin end they'd stick out 1.1 km into the ocean.

Star gazing: under ideal viewing conditions, like in the Australian Outback, the naked eye can detect about 5,780 stars, I counted them one night when I had nothing better to do.........???

The Sydney Opera House roof weighs more than 161,000 tons.

The Great Barrier Reef is the largest organic construction on earth.

Termite mounds are the tallest non-human constructions on earth.

Yulara, the Aboriginal name of the Ayers Rock Resort, means "crying", "weeping".

The cynics amongst us say it’s called that because that's what visitors do when they see their bill...

If you find that any of these fun facts about Australia are out of date or just plain wrong, don't crucify me, just let me know and I'll fix it and if you know any more good fun facts about Australia, or have a funny story about Australia, let me know that too and I'll add it, in the meantime...........enjoy.



by: John Morrad

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124 Comments:

Anonymous said...

WTF? France a British penal colony for the cowardly and annoying. You need to go back to school.

Anonymous said...

It would seem that the first few parts are about bashing other countries rather then giving information about Australia. The rest of the text is just too damn long.

Anonymous said...

When the Vic's decided create their festival, they asked an Aboriginal for a sugestion. He said "Moomba". This was adopted. It really means "stick it up your arse".

When the first whites saw a kangaroo, they asked one of the locals. He said "kangaroo". Translated, it means, "I do not understand you".

Anonymous said...

>Australia was actually Britain's first attempt at a penal colony

Actually, America was first with a British penal colony up until the American revolution in 1776.

Once kick out of America, the Brits decided to colonise Australia (East coast only discovered by Capt Cook in 1770)

Australia was a British penal colony from 1778 to 1840

Anonymous said...

Kevin is no longer the Prime Minister -- it is now Julia Gillard, but after October, she might well get the arse too.

Anonymous said...

Kevin Rudd is no longer Prime Minister

Anonymous said...

You spelled Uluru wrong!

Anonymous said...

Perth is the most isolated capital city in the world. An ocean on one side and a desert on the other.

Anonymous said...

Stop complaining you stupid bastards, have a laugh.

Anonymous said...

The first parts are just jokes, you guys take it too seriously.

Anonymous said...

Despite the above criticisms: As you Aussies say, good on ya, mate! From a Texan in Fort Worth!

Anonymous said...

I hate when people come and say shit like "Good on ya" and "G-day" THAT'S FOR AUSSIES TO SAY ONLY! WE FIND IT RACEST THAT YOU ARE SAYING IT TO US AND NOT FUNNY! ok also it's pronounces ozzi... i'm sick of being called an assie! that is all...

Anonymous said...

I have a brother named Osborne
( pronounced -Oz-born). Its really funny cause he was born in Australia . Get it.... Aus born-Australian Born

Anonymous said...

Great facts lmfao go away haters find something else to piss all over

Anonymous said...

Australia is VERY multi-cultural now. Lots of different races live here, from Asian to Indian. There are many different languages, and not every Australian uses slang language. Sydney is mostly made up of Asians, Melbourne mostly has Indians. The FIRST native Australians were the aboriginal people.

Fishy said...

"I hate when people come and say shit like "Good on ya" and "G-day" THAT'S FOR AUSSIES TO SAY ONLY! WE FIND IT RACEST THAT YOU ARE SAYING IT TO US AND NOT FUNNY! ok also it's pronounces ozzi... i'm sick of being called an assie! that is all..."

I refuse to admit I live in the same continent as you >.> LEARN! ENGLISH!

Also: yes the majority of the article is 'wrong' but if you can't tell that it's a joke by the second paragraph you have serious issues :P

Anonymous said...

This is retarded, you are acting as if we are brawny men with not much brain power.

Anonymous said...

Australia invented Chinese food. Particularly the No. 6 and the No. 17

guy said...

rest assured noone really gives a shit what you think.

Lexy said...

BTW "Yulara" is the name of the town near where Ayers Rock is located.

The Aboriginal name for it is "Uluru"

amari9 said...

"I hate when people come and say shit like "Good on ya" and "G-day" THAT'S FOR AUSSIES TO SAY ONLY! WE FIND IT RACEST THAT YOU ARE SAYING IT TO US AND NOT FUNNY! ok also it's pronounces ozzi... i'm sick of being called an assie! that is all..."

If you're black and someone called you "the 'N' word", I'd understand but from what I know, "Good on ya" and/or "G'day" are greetings originating from the fun-loving, laid back, friendly nation of Australia. I bet you're just another bogan. The grammar says it all.

Anonymous said...

okay okay dingos are not native to Aust. they're just not counted as introduced because they fit in well here and there are no animals that are even distant relatives to dogs here... i just wanted to say and one more thing to the person who said

"I hate when people come and say shit like "Good on ya" and "G-day" THAT'S FOR AUSSIES TO SAY ONLY! WE FIND IT RACEST THAT YOU ARE SAYING IT TO US AND NOT FUNNY! ok also it's pronounces ozzi... i'm sick of being called an assie! that is all..."

i know what you mean it is sooo annoying when someone cant say the name right *grr* and you know whats even worse? when they don't do our accent right in cartoons! did you see that episode of the simpsons where bart calls some kid in the outback to ask him which way the water flows down the drain? that was nothing like our accent... but it was funny to hear them try lol what losers

Anonymous said...

"Australia is VERY multi-cultural now. Lots of different races live here, from Asian to Indian."

Indians are tecnically Asian.

Also, don't take it too seriously guys, Aussie's aren't rascist, we just like to have a laugh :)

Tony B said...

Nope, we were the second penal colony. The English were dumping their prisoners onto what later became american soil, then after they rebelled against the King, they used Australia.

Anonymous said...

You left out that Ausdtralia is an Amercian clone, and full of racist biggots, who think Boat people are going to invade them anytime soon.

Australia, has no manufacturing industry, it was given to China so the CEO and executives can make more money for themselves.

Australia is firmly controlled, owned and operated by American interest.

We have one of the worlds biggest most corrupt, useless governments on the planet.

Australia is a nanny state, were the Government rules on everything. It has invaded all aspects of private life.

Australian Police have some of the worlds most oppressive powers, yet they remain one of the most incompetent and corrupt Police forces in the world.

Australia is the ONLY 1st world country to have an actuall "LIVE", ongoing Military intervention on it's own people. It has an active Military intervention on it's indigenous peoples.

It was done to free up the legislation that stopped Rio Tinto and BHP from mining certain areas of Australia.

Australia is a country of greedy, fat, car obsessed, selfish people. That is what it has become under the influence of American policy and pro-conservative think-tanks, like the "Australia Institute".

WHilst Australia remians one of the richest countries on Earth, due to it's vast natural resources. It's Education, Public Transport, Public Infrastructure is in tatters.

This is due to the direct influence of American style corporate policy and ideology, designed to strip away the wealth of the people and give it to the controlling fat cat's.

Even thou it is sooooooo rich it's beyond comprehension.... A recent social study, suggesteted, that Australian workers are amongst the world's most exploited and ripped off.

It showed how in the last 15 years, Australian workers, are working longer hours for less money and more credit debt.

It showed our social fabric was breaking up due to the stress and extra hours required to kept on top of interest debt.

Australian Media is controlled by 2 individuals. Making the Australian media, one of the most lackluster, subservient media services any were in the world today.

Australia has become a land of oppression, fear and loathing.

Anonymous said...

Not all Aussies are racist bigots, I find that offensive, we have a hard enough time being referred to as the "dumb blonde of the world", without you adding to it, yes there maybe people who think that but you do not need to lump us in with them, it's wrong.

We maybe "America lite" but since we have a population of around 20 million and they got over 200 million, what do you expect?

We were arguably the only country to escape the GFC(which the Americans started)and still managed to keep unemployment at low levels.

What does America churn out except bad T.V and terrible clones of better movies(death at a funeral, jap horror)

We have a better education system, unlike America where they just teach the kids standardized testing and leave 'em illiterate, we have free health care, we treat our elderly, disabled and unemployed better.

The weather might be better off your pedestal.

Anonymous said...

great post and great comment to the "land of fear and loathing" guy.

Anonymous said...

Australia and America had very similar genesis'. Both had penal colonies, but a lot of people went to America to embrace religious freedoms and at the time it was the peak of free ideals.

Nobody wanted to go to Australia.

America started at the top, and could only go down. Australia started at the bottom, and could only go up.

And they did.

Anonymous said...

Just remember the people that critisise Australia are the people who have never set foot on it. Maybe they should get out of their house and really see what Australia is like. (P.S don't go to kununurra if you value your wallet and car)

Anonymous said...

Just some more fun facts for people actually interested and couldn't give a crap about the idiots crying about this and that.

Our new Prime Minister is Julia Gillard, she has a stereotypical Australian accent that doesn't really exist in the cities any more.

You should really check out our sporting events: the football finals in September, Melbourne Cup in November and Australian open in January and the F1 race in Melbourne are all good ones to head to.
And finally, we're all nice people and there isn't any dislike of tourists in the country that you mind find in somewhere like Italy.

Anonymous said...

its uluru! silly person ^^
and wild rabbits ain't that cute =\
im pretty sure they called it uluru because when it rained the sand of the rock would run and appear to be weeping... :)

Anonymous said...

also Julia Gillard is Prime Minister now :)
I'm an aussie and i love Australia, its an amazing place to visit! if you do rather than going to the cities try to get out and discover the beautiful outback and environment!:D

Anonymous said...

"Australians are strong, loyal, trustworthy, and fierce fighters. If for some unimaginable reason you don't own a gun, consider carrying an Australian instead."

funny article.

"fear and loathing guy" i guess your one of few who see purely the negitives in australia. with your knowledge you could have recomend solutions to these problems -- you know paint a brighter future as you see it -- and your comments would have had an even more valid meaning. this could also avoid giving the impression we Ozzies are a total bunch of mindless followers of corperate programing, spewing Americanisms from every orifice. this may be your view but its not the popular one.

John So's Bro said...

Australia is a land of oppression, fear and loathing?

Obviously you have never stepped outside of your little tent and ventured out very far into the big wide world. Go take a Holiday in The Congo and get back to me you snapperhead.

Like someone else said, rather then just spew a pile of negative, and often misinformed, information. Why not put forth your ideas on improving these issues? Or are you just one of these left wing tree huggers that jump up and down with a witty sign "making" a difference?

P.S. Funny Article, gave me a good giggle.
Anyone that has been to Australia or spoken with an Aussie would understand this is all tongue in cheek piss taking sprinkled with a few fun facts. Lighten up people, sheeesh!

Fallon said...

Loving the anti-australian sentiments here, especially the ones under the guise of anonynimity.

Im pretty sure if you point out some of the bad points and chuck in a few that are made up, you can make any nation look bad. Its quite clear what the problem is here; you havent seen the sign.

Australia - If you dont like it...fuck off.

Anonymous said...

That was quite funny!

Also prime minister is Julia Gillard now.

Anonymous said...

"Australia has become a land of oppression, fear and loathing" Damn right...

Australia is a filthy country run by fags and dykes. It has corrupt and complicated law enforcement and banking systems based on purposes of ripping people off.

Life is very expensive and You have to work so hard and sacrifice so much to achieve something in life.

Its people are lazy, racist and backward. Most of them don't like outsiders. They look down on immigrants and treat all of them like 3rd world people. They are also coward and uneducated, they don't know anything about the world we're living in and they shit themselves when they go overseas.

Wherever you go people give you fake smiles and pretend to be friendly and happy. In fact, they're fucked in the head and vast majority of people are depressed. They have no morals or dignity.

I could take all day to critise Australia. There are very few good things about Australia and they're not worth to be mentioned, anyway.

If I were to come to this world again Australia would be the last place to choose.

Good people of the world;
Stay away from Australia.

John So's Bro said...

"It's people are lazy, racist and backward."

Pot! Kettle!
Did you even bother to read your own comment?

Anonymous said...

'I could take all day to critise Australia. There are very few good things about Australia and they're not worth to be mentioned, anyway.'

Geez, what happened, dude? Get fucked over by your Australian girlfriend?

Anonymous said...

LOL Americans are calling us fat? Seriously guys look in the mirror! And we're nothing like racist! Practically half of sydney is asians, and we respect that. If you really think that about Australia, you've obviously never been here. It's much much better then that shithole you call America.

Anonymous said...

Australia.

-The country is great.
-The Government is stupid.
-Parliment is funny to watch.
-Police are underpaid and overworked.
-Other countries don't understand the difference between "racism" and a joke.
-I like it (although the Government could use some cleaning up).

Anonymous said...

"If I were to come to this world again Australia would be the last place to choose.

Good people of the world;
Stay away from Australia."

WTF is wrong with you? Hypocrite much.
"Its people are lazy, racist and backward."
And you're not, saying all those shitty stuff? You don't even know Australia. You don't even know what Australia has to offer. You are a sadcase.

Piss off you crazy SOAB.

Anonymous said...

From A Proud Aussie - To the RACIST BIGOT THAT POSTED THE VERY DEROGATORY POST ABOVE UNDER ANONYMOUS - (firstly I say to you - if you don't like it here - then piss off to wherever it is that your knuckle dragging neanderthal body came from !!! WE AUSSIES FROM ALL BACKGROUNDS (BORN HERE OR NOT) DON'T WANT YOUR PURE FILTH HERE MAKING OUR BEAUTIFUL AUSTRALIA DIRTY !!! (read below for I will further slay this wanna be dragon)

This is what the SCUM WROTE ABOVE -----
---------- Australia has become a land of oppression, fear and loathing" Damn right...

Australia is a filthy country run by fags and dykes. It has corrupt and complicated law enforcement and banking systems based on purposes of ripping people off.

Life is very expensive and You have to work so hard and sacrifice so much to achieve something in life.

Its people are lazy, racist and backward. Most of them don't like outsiders. They look down on immigrants and treat all of them like 3rd world people. They are also coward and uneducated, they don't know anything about the world we're living in and they shit themselves when they go overseas.

Wherever you go people give you fake smiles and pretend to be friendly and happy. In fact, they're fucked in the head and vast majority of people are depressed. They have no morals or dignity.

I could take all day to critise Australia. There are very few good things about Australia and they're not worth to be mentioned, anyway.

If I were to come to this world again Australia would be the last place to choose.

Good people of the world;
Stay away from Australia.-------------

YOU ARE THE BIGGEST RACIST BIGOT WHO IS UNFORTUNATELY LIVING RIGHT HERE IN 'OUR BEAUTIFUL AUSTRALIA'. I hope the fleas of a thousand camels infest your filthy underwear. I have seen you types of comments before and I am pretty sure I know h=who you are. You are the scum that breeds off the scum, that lines public toilet seats!!! So go home seeing as you despise it so much here - LIKE YOU SAY!!! We won't stop you - in fact - Tell us when your boat/plane leaves and I am sure a number of us will be there to wave goodbye to your filthy arse!!! Just out of interest, what banking system is it that you prefer? You are a financial leech no doubt living off our tax dollars!! Go Home to where it is that you believe is sooooooo much better than here in 'OUR BEAUTIFUL AUSTRALIA'. You are a disgrace to our Nation!!!

Anonymous said...

i was having a laugh at myself and australia, thinking that this was quite well written, until i got to the comments. to the asswipe who wrote the most racist comment i have ever heard against any race: GO DIE IN A HOLE AND LET THE ROTTWEILLERS EAT U ALIVE. have u ever been to my country? we joke about australia, but that went 2 million kilometres over the effing line. stuff you.

Anonymous said...

To the wankers bad mouthing Australia, you and your type will NEVER be welcome here. If you are already living here, then go back to the shithole you came from you ungrateful, disrespectful parasites!

Nigel said...

Hahahahaha!! Mr I came from a third world country thinking I could parasite of Australia. What happened? Didnt anyone tell you Australians are battlers. Nothing in this world comes easy, its sad you come here expecting respect when you have that hater attitude. As you no doubt have heard many times before.. If you dont like it you should have stayed in your original homeland and fought to improve it!

Nikki said...

"We have one of the worlds biggest most corrupt, useless governments on the planet."
Go live in Somalia or China. kthxbai

"They look down on immigrants and treat all of them like 3rd world people."
Parents were boat people and I, nor my parents, have experienced this treatment.

Stay classy, troll.

Australian Citizen said...

People shouldn't make stereotypical decisions regarding subjects or places they now very little about. A lot of people insult the entire American population for an apparent idiocity. Why is this? Most of these people have never even experienced a day in the life of these people; however if you were an American and you heard these things, you would be insulted. Therefore is it not hypocrytical for someone to assume that what they hear from judgemental biggets is true? I am a proud Australian, and have also travelled around the world. I have seen many different cultures and living conditions, and for someone to say that living in Australia is anything less than a privelage, is a small minded and ignorant fool.

And for all of those people living here and are downtalking this fantastic country, feel free to find somewhere else. If you are too far up your own arse to be thankful for all of the good things this country provides you, then why should we accomodate you. There are plenty of people in the world who would give anything for the simple things that you take for granted.

And please for the love of God, no more conspiracy theories or claims that we are just following others. We do what is in the best interest of our people, just like any other country.

Anonymous said...

nice to know that rednecks are still alive and strong here in australia

Anonymous said...

That guy who said all that shit about australian must be have said it as a joke or is actually mentally retarded
"Wherever you go people give you fake smiles and pretend to be friendly and happy. In fact, they're fucked in the head and vast majority of people are depressed. They have no morals or dignity" WTF???

we are easily one of the happiest, most un corrupt nation on earth as everywhere i go people are happy to see eachother also

"Australia, has no manufacturing industry, it was given to China so the CEO and executives can make more money for themselves." This makes no fucking sense, if anyone has studied economics that could tell u that no country on earth with wages as high as ours could compete with the low wages of china manufactoring industry. no county is perfect but ours is pretty close, so crawl back to ur shitty 3rd world country and keep of the net until you can gather enough braincells to offer a half decent comment

Aussie said...

If you bad mouth Australia you can all PISS OFF. This is easily the best country in the best country in the world to live in and Americans all think that we are lazy drunks. Aussies are fighters and these Americans who are so uninformed about this beautiful country. An example is The View. One person says "Australians don't treat aboriginals well." Have you ever been here bitch. I mean really. In the past Aborignals have been treated poorly, but our common sense is up now, unlike you bloody Americans. So I say this to you. Unless you have been to Australia for at least a month, do not comment on Australia. Do not do a crap imitation of our accent and NEVER NEVER bad mouth this beautiful country of ours

Anonymous said...

tie me kangaroo down sport, interpreted to new zealand language is tie me sheep down sport.

Anonymous said...

Oh but we have Miranda Kerr... YEAH BABY!

Anonymous said...

I think it's horrible about how there is no mention of the original Australians in this article - Aboriginals. They are amongst the oldest known populations in the world. with a history going back 70,000 years. i think that's A LOT more noteworthy than beer, pies, pubs, utes and other stereotypical symbols of what it is to be "Australian"

Also in response to a previous comment. the word Kangaroo does not mean "I don't know" it stems from the word gunguru - which was the word for Grey kangaroo in one of the Aboriginal languages (there were over 250 different Aboriginal languages at the time) and apparently this confusion was made when another Aboriginal group did not recognize the word since they spoke a different language. hence the "i dont know" myth. just clearing things up.

oh and here's another FUN FACT.

IN THE 1970s, the government forcibly removed Aboriginal children from their families and sent them to white families and church-run institutions for cultural reprogramming. A recent national report on the policies found that there was not a single Indigenous family that did not have at least one child taken away

Anonymous said...

Hey fellow good peoples, don't bother responding to certain negative comments from certain people here. They are obviously just trying to get a bite. Let them be. You can find a hater for anything in this world. Life's too short.

All I can say is I've work in the tourism industry here for 14 years and I can't remember anyone that wasn't overall impressed and loved their Australian experience.

We are relatively far away from the majority of the global population, so it's usually not the first country someone will travel to. But if you are from over seas and ever get the chance to make the trip, no matter who you are or where you are from, will find open, relaxed and easygoing people, a clean but modern way of life, and many unique and diverse places and people to discover. It is a very large place and there is much more to it than the (marketable) Aussie icon's like the Sydney Oprah House, Gold Coast and Uluru. Experience these by all means but we have less known but just as great places like the Kimberly’s in Nth Western Australia, Perth, Barossa Valley, Wilpena Pound, Tasmanian forests, and as already mentioned the major sporting events in Melbourne to merely name just a few.

Like any country in the world, our city life (and people) is vastly different to county life (and people). And yes surprise, surprise not all 21 or so million people and going to have the same attitude. Believe it or not we do have some dick heads and "rednecks" here, and yes the original Australians have got a bum deal, but as a nation we are working hard to change this. Over all we are a kind and open people, mostly a young culture (sometimes spelt with a capital K in certain parts of the country), which mainly stems from a relatively sheltered and peaceful, short history. We are the lucky country, a fact I only truly realised after seeing (some of) the rest of the world.

[To Amari9 who said ""I hate when people come and say shit like "Good on ya" and "G-day" THAT'S FOR AUSSIES TO SAY ONLY! WE FIND IT RACIST THAT YOU ARE SAYING IT TO US AND NOT FUNNY!"
Get over yourself! I am very far from the Aussie stereotype myself and like break the stereo type where possible, but just take the piss out yourself like the rest of us. To use the term RACIST I can safely assume WOULD BE VERY OFFENSIVE TO ANYONE THAT TRULY KNOWS THE MEANING - you and I do not know the true meaning.
And to those Australians saying that the haters are "not welcome" and to "PISS OFF", well you're not helping our point, your actually confirming some of their arguments.]

Obviously I don not speak for all Australians, but I know there is a lot of people that I do. Yes, we are not a perfect country, - but we are bloody good one, one that you will love if you make the effort discover.

For what is worth,
My 2cents,
Adam

(oh yeah, good effort on the article John Morrad).

Anonymous said...

Australia is definitely a country on the decline. The standard of living is falling by any measurements , and this has been the case for the last 20 years. Unfortunately we Australians are very deluded, and if the pollies say we have a world class this or that, the sheeple will believe it, even though it is evident that this is not the case. Crime in Australia is appalling. Also Australians have a great sense of humor when its making fun of non Australians, but have no sense of humor when the humor is making fun of them. Australians are world champions at being hypocrites, and Australian beer is of very low quality.

Anonymous said...

Australia is definitely a country on the decline. The standard of living is falling by any measurements , and this has been the case for the last 20 years. Unfortunately we Australians are very deluded, and if the pollies say we have a world class this or that, the sheeple will believe it, even though it is evident that this is not the case. Crime in Australia is appalling. Also Australians have a great sense of humor when its making fun of non Australians, but have no sense of humor when the humor is making fun of them. Australians are world champions at being hypocrites, and Australian beer is of very low quality.

Anonymous said...

There is a lot of hating going on here. Don't hate on Australia, because it's a great country with great people; but don't hate on the united states either. America is a great country as well. Both have good as well as bad aspects about them. They are very similar in a lot of ways, yet there are subtle differences. Don't hate what you don't know. Funny article, by the way.

Anonymous said...

lol, funny flame on france... however if it werent for that napoleon war britain would have never been able to claim australia as a colony (nor north america, various parts of africa, and various parts of asia in the late 1700's)

Anonymous said...

"pollies say we have a world class this or that, the sheeple will believe it"

I think the sheeple are the ones who believe the self interested media that tries to undermine the government, usually News Corp. Seems similar in the US

Australia usually has pretty good well meaning governments, which have suffered from popularism and been less affective for it, partly due the simple minded voters.

I love living in Australia, the faults with it are many but who cares the quality of life is incredible.

Anonymous said...

New Prime Minister now...Instead of the weird looking 4 eyes it's a female ranga...

Anonymous said...

I am a Japanese and I have been working in Australia for 3 years, Aussies are cool and friendly.

Anonymous said...

Perth is closer to Jakarta than it is to Brisbane

Anonymous said...

Thanks John Morrad good piece it opened a can of worms for sure. Loved the dry and dark sense of humor that some Aussies inherit and some don't understand.

Lol at some of the comments, some of you need to lighten up. I'm Australian born, live in Melbourne and can tell you Australia is a interesting place. Besides the Government & conglomerates, corporations raping the people and sending us workers in a downward spiral.

Due to increasing costs from all corners and very poor planning. It's a good place with interesting and entwining cultures out of all my friends only 2 are what you could call Aussie's not a yobbo because rednecks are backward and racist something i am not.

At primary school that i attended out of all the students their backgrounds consisted from 90 different countries, i was taught diversity at school.. And to be honest I have experienced what some of the anonymous comments on here say about the racists you will get that anywhere not just Australia. Indians are a funny bunch especially in India if your from the south and you go to the north god help you.. Same as African's well Somalians at least if a brother doesn't like the guy his sister is seeing he will kill him that's no lie. I can think of a lot worse places and people than what we have in Australia.

I know the real history of "Commonwealth Australia" the west coast was discovered by the french there was a stuff up in France with papers etc so it was never recoginsed officially. The British discovered the east coast and started colonising it. Overtime They eventually discovered the rest of Australia and claimed it. The dutch discovered Tasmania hence the name.

Anonymous said...

Australia is a beautiful country, people are so funny and friendly. i am loving australia and its people.. i hope i could stay here forever..

Anonymous said...

For the love of God if your reading this from overseas don't waste your money coming here. Australia has nothing to offer. The capital cities are over rated dumps! surrounded by suburbs of mediocrity inhabited by mean spirited & aggresive drones... trust me Australia will bore you sh*tless!

jegelu2008 said...

telling people to fuck off back to their country just reinforces the wrong stereotype that we are racist.

i love my country but there are arseholes no matter where you go on this planet.

Anonymous said...

im an aussie n this is a funny and cool story bro... nways haters gonna hate

Anonymous said...

I live in Australia, and I love it here. Oh, and to everyone saying that ALL Austrlians are racist, saying that is steriotyping and, oh yeah, racism. I'm not going to say that no one in Australia is racist, but thats true for EVERY place on earth. So if you don't like Australia, don't read articles on it, its that simple.

Oh, and this article is funny.

Anonymous said...

Australians are strong, loyal, trustworthy, and fierce fighters. If for some unimaginable reason you don't own a gun, consider carrying an Australian instead. LOL

Anonymous said...

i just have to say whats with all this bullshit negativity? this is just a bit of fun someone wrote online, no one has forced you to read it or anything. to those writing comments about us Aussies be racists idiots take a look in the mirror you are being racists idiots just by saying that yes we may have people who aren't the sharpest tools in the shed but so does every other country in the world and honey racism is still around the whole world. every single person i have met living here have been nothing but polite and friendly always willing to hang and chillax (BTW if we were all racist bigots why would some of our most famous people be of a different race or culture huh?). and for those saying that our education is practically non existent thats bullshit the schools in my area have had highest ranking scores in the 2 major tests we have in year 10 and 12 all hitting from the 70s up.we're not trying to be anything we are not our slang is our slang just like other countries have theirs. as for our country being very american orientated yea TV wise just like Americans and English love our TV. we aren't a world thats divided because of the thousands of km separating us we have phones internet satellites so as a world we are trading everything. and the best all of you saying these things i bet are from a country where Aussies have jumped in to help you whether with wars or famine or anything and your badmouthing us to that extent maybe we shouldn't have helped then you would have a reason to bitch and moan about us but you don't.

Anonymous said...

Im an aussie and i dont actually know anyone that says g'day mate or acts in the sterotypical way if you actually get to know a true australian you will find we are loyal trustworthy people and when we say we are gunna do something we will

Anonymous said...

i found it funny and although i have a sense of humour, i find it hard to laugh if i watch david lettermen. i don't critisize it, i just don't understand the humour. i`d like to see a similar page about america or russia. english comedy rocks so no doubt if it were about england it would be funny too. to me! :)
i say g`day at anytime of day, im an indabloodyvidual :)

Bill said...

It's a joke Joyce.

Anonymous said...

f@#k australia

Anonymous said...

The only thing of that post, which i dear hope was satire, that is somewhat correct is Australian beer

VB tastes like 4 month old horse piss filtered through cow manure (if that were drinkers piss you'll have the recipe for medieval saltpeter)

Instead drink Cascade, James Boag's or a German one

I'm a South African Migrant to Australia and I'll shall provide my opinion as i have nothing better to do (it's 1:30 am) for anyone with nothing better to do but read.

Okay what I like about Australia:

The standard of education:
Yes you will always get smart and not-so-smart, disruptive, un-wanting to learn people in society but as it goes the Public high school near by is topnotch surpassing that of many Private schools, but that could just by the local high school

The laid back attitude:
This is not meaning lazy. I know several people who haven't bothered filing building permission for "complicated retaining walls" but nobody seems to mind. Another example is when i was younger i visited a fire station, and while messing around with a face masked i triggered the oxygen to flow, to which the response from the firemen was "why is that thing on, it should not be on, just flick the switch there and we'll fix it later after you guys have left" (they even gave us a fake call out printout saying that the address was the fire station and the we were on fire) Yes this sometime changes such as when your friends evil landlord neighbor suddenly decides to oppose a boundary fence even though he's signed to allow it and lawyers follow. This laid-back attitude also extends to the sense of humour and acceptance of the people. Yes again you find the bad eggs of society here (and a good morning to you Fred Nile)but most can take a joke even at their own expense and generally very welcoming of everybody, tourist, Refugees, homosexuals, Red Haired Prime Ministers (whoops, starting to get a bit political here).

The scenery:
Not much to do with the people but this alone is a good reason to visit

the people:
I think I already covered this in the section of laid back attitudes but you get all kinds of people here, most of whom are nice and "good" people (there is an Asian shop attendant at the local train station who recognises me from when I was in primary school (i came here when i was 7). And yes i have met several people with stereotypical Australian accents but in the cities you probably won't find any as they are very multicultural.

The political system and politics:
It takes time to get used to, can be argued as one of the best and works to some degree. As for the politics of Australia, There is always change necessary and we are not always on top of it all.

Social Services:
Are very useful. You might think of them as a waste of taxpayers money but they help, if anything the reduce crime rates and suicides. They provide medical services which are a bit silly at sometimes when it comes to the process but it means you can walk into any hospital and receive treatment and not have to worry. Yes some of the roads are a bit tattered and some of the ones in the Outback are even dirt, and you get the odd silly policeman but all in all the services are good (the government is giving everyone optical fiber links to their homes for internet even though a friend of mine doesn't have gas down the end of his street and uses bottles of LPG and he is in the middle of Sydney, sort of).

It's Location:
we are very close to Australian's favourite holiday place... New Zealand

So that is all i could be bothered to right about with out knowing if i'll get an audience.

so cheers everybody and just stop this Flame war and how about focus on pointing out the good factors of your country not other people's.

Anonymous said...

gibberish from some tosser who hates the French. Probably because they understood the meaning of the word "liberty". French meaning: to free yourself. American meaning: to kill innocent foreigners.

Craig said...

Nice work. LOL

Anonymous said...

I'm pretty glad you haters dislike Australia so much, because then at least you'll stay out of here. Good article, by the way.

Anonymous said...

No.

Anonymous said...

What is your problem? (Directed at the people who are saying rude and nasty things about Australia):

There are a few people here making highly offence and down right nasty comments about Australia and some bloody don't even know how to spell Australia correctly.

Why are there people saying that we are depressed?

Have most of you even been to Australia? If you haven't than you might find it different to what you think it is. We are not just a bunch of backward, depressed, racists. If you come here you'll find that we are one of the most multi cultural nations in the world.

There was one person who said (and I quote): "You left out that Ausdtralia is an Amercian clone, and full of racist biggots, who think Boat people are going to invade them anytime soon." (there's the not spelling Australia right)This person says "WE" during this article like they live in Australia! but come on I've never heard any Australian bad mouth their country like that and I don't think I ever will. Because here in Australia we don't do bad mouth our country and make up idiotic lies and post them on the INTERNET. If there is only thing Australian's don;t like is people bad mouthing their country. Whats worse is if people haven't been here.

I love Australia and it is one of the best places in the world. I'm so glad to have been born here and tomorrow is Australia Day, yay, I'm spending the day at the beach or by the pool. Glad I'm not in Sydney though it's going to be hot there.(I wonder how hot it's going to be here where I am).

As for this article I got a good laugh out of it and I don't know why people are using it to make hateful comments about Australia.

From an average auzzie, who loves where she's lives and where she was born.

Kitty.Dixon said...

Whoever's bagging on this blog is retarded. He is not being racist, it's kinda impossible to be racist in Australia when nearly everyone you know is asian, european or middle eastern. Fuck you to the person who's bagging on Australia. You're probably American and have never been here. Let me tell you it's not much different to America, if anything it's way better. Everyone's nicer and calmer and best of all not so bloody materialistic and superficial. I spend a great time in the US particularly Houston and San Diego and yes, it's such a convenient country because of the crazy amount of restaurants and malls but a majority of you are stupid, selfish and arrogant. Especially your teenagers.

Australia's awesome and John Morrad you did an epic job on this blog!

Anonymous said...

I am from South East Asia, I am living in Australia for seven years. I have experienced racism a lot from Australians. But I have to say there are some very friendly people as well in Australia. So It is not right to say that "it's kinda impossible to be racist" because thats not true. There is racism going on in Australia, but some people are just great. This country is nice there is no doubt about that but racism do exist in Australia and it's not even a little bit. And it's usually about the skin color, religion, and background which is not right. Usually in work places schools and in Universities this happens, and I have experienced it, but some people are really nice.

So I guess there are good and bad people everywhere in this world, and no country is even near to being perfect. This is a FACT.

I am use to the Australian ways now :D and I would again say it is a nice country.

Anonymous said...

Brilliant, funny as mate haha

Anonymous said...

Contrary to popular belief, all of my friends are not, and never have been racist, (although sometimes we make jokes...) we are all well educated and we're not fat or lazy. If you live in the outback (i don't but some of my friends did) it's hard work, especially with those recent floodings and bush fires we've just had. By the way, fags and dykes, nothing wrong with them, homophobe.

Aaron said...

hahahahahaha loved it mate.
great article taking the piss out of the australians
Im aussie born and personally i wouldnt trade it for the world.
sure we have our downsides but doesnt every country.
and i bet that everyone bashing us are americans and poms that got pissed cause we smash you lot every time we play any sport against you.

And to the person who said our country is run by "fags and dykes" you are a pathetic homophobe that has an insanely narrow minded view of humanity and i bet your involved with the westborow baptist church you wanker. Anyways whats wrong with gays or lesbians anyway? they are exactly the same as every other member of society. except for you, you homophobic, racist, narrow minded...wanker.

And to whoever said aussie beer like vb tastes shit...you're right its like a liquid version of a goddamn ashtray.

Anonymous said...

Quite frankly anyone saying Australia is "run" by "*insert a million expletives here*" is pretty much correct, It's about as close as you can get to a dictatorship without actually being one.

Right now I might prefer to live in Germany or even Japan, but all we need to do is try and clean up government, get morons like Conroy and Gillard out of the way and we're looking at being about as good as we can get.

Oh and yeah, I never really understood the "Australians are racist" stereotype... there are more Asians in Adelaide then anything else...

Anonymous said...

I bet that guy who made the 'fuck australia' comment is a dirty muslim.

Anonymous said...

Not all Australians dont have guns.....we dont need them.. we have more brains than the americans. guns are lammee.....we have ourselves too protect us :)

Isabelle said...

These comments here just prove that stupidity knows no borders nor oceans. It's a disease that runs rampant across all continents of planet Earth infecting generations then passing it on to their disgusting offspring. Resulting in severely stupid, ill-informed comments across the internet.

This article was some light-hearted fun with some dry, unique Australian humour. People see the need to degrade this country and others see the need to defend it. Plenty with bad grammar, punctuation and spelling. Or some just pretending to be witty and intelligent.

Australia has it's flaws no doubt, but perfection is something so impossible and unattainable that it would be ridiculous to expect anything less. But in terms of our quality of life we have it made, like I said we have plenty of flaws but go spend a while in places like Congo and Sudan then get back to me.

I'd also like to point out that Australia continually makes the top ten in least corrupted countries is the world.

So please,do your research before coming on here and making unfounded claims. I could write a ten-thousand word essay on how good Australia and many countries have it but why would I put in the time, knowledge and research just get back a tl:dr like I always do.

So instead I'll make a list of things to look up.

1. Corruption in countries
2. Worlds best Education systems
3. Worlds best Health Systems

And this;

http://hdr.undp.org/en/media/HDR_2010_EN_Tables_reprint.pdf

The 2010 Human development report by the United Nations Development Programme. Most likely the most reliable source for information and data. Don't worry I have you like link to the data in PDF form so it's easier for tiny minds to comprehend. (Its about quality of life.)

Anonymous said...

I am a Kiwi living in Perth, Western Australia. I have been in Australia since the year 2000. I realise that I am a guest in this wonderful country. I respect native australians and all other australians living here. I work hard, mind my own business, support the Salvos etc. Australia is the biggest island in the world. It has the most unique landscape in the world. I have learned to love the culture, the food, the beaches are to die for, the fresh air, the endless sunshine and bbqs. Australia has animals found no where else in the world. Australia is the gateway to many other countries including Thailand, Indonesia and New Zealand. I would not want to live annywhere but right here in Perth.

Anonymous said...

i have only one thing to say

Pauline Hanson for prime minister :-]

that should get the comments restarted ..

bwahaha

Anonymous said...

Julia Gillard is the prime minister now, and Taronga zoo in sydeny is a lot like Australia zoo

ashe said...

I'm an Aussie-born Aussie, and I know there's racism.Hell, I've seen it before.But the people who do that are bloody wankers who get bagged out for being racist (I've seen that too)
Congrats to John Morrad for making such an awesome article that was hilarious.
Most Aussies are laid back with a good, if somewhat unique, sense of humor.Australia isn't a land of fear or oppression (I don't know where they got that from) and is generally happy and laid back.Although whatever government we seem to elect, they're always crap. (In NSW that is.I'm sorry but I have no idea about the rest of the states)
I have never heard the g'day mate expression that us Aussies are renowned for, and the only time I have heard the 'typical' Aussie accent is when I hear Julia Gillard speak.
Having finished my rant, I shall stop writing

Anonymous said...

Im born here with parents from Fiji. I have lived here all my life but i have been fortunate enough to visit every continent, and see what life is like in other parts of the world. What really irks me is those so called "Australians" who speak bad about our great nation. Simple fact is, if you dont like living here, get the hell out. There are many thousands of people who would love to come and live here and wouldnt complain one bit. they are called immigrants. They understand the value of a home, free education, free healthcare, good public infrastructure, ready access to the Internet and other services, high pay etc etc.

Australians were once known for being jovial, loving and laid back people, it now seems though that we have(we not all of us) now become a clone of the whining Americans. I know this may sound like my inner Bogan coming out, but if you dont agree with what we do here, bugger off!!

Shane Thompson said...

Actually, the Aboriginal name for Ayers Rock is Uluru.

Derrick said...

They forgot to add here that we Australians are racists and hate non-whites.

Anonymous said...

It is so sad to see that my mother was right, "the only thing more stupid than a sheep is a human".
What a pity to see the lighthearted comments of the original get reduced to a forum for the rednecks and ideologists, all with their heads up their own collective arses.
Nothing more hateful than a redneck and the only true wilderness is found between a greenies ears.
Australia IS still the lucky country.
The Liberal/Labor coalition, two party preferred system, IS corrupt.
Bank ripoffs are Global not just Australian.
Thank you for spoiling this site. Bah, or is that, Baa Humbug.

Ant.Downunder said...

G'day from Melbourne Australia

Thank you for your great page, I am very lucky to live in the best country in the world and invite anyone to join us in this great southern land the we call the land Downunder

K.Rudd is no longer and we have a Ranga running the show now lol which is all good, she cant root things up more than the man with the ears an elephant would feel happy with.

But the best part about this country apart from the Beer Women Beer Food Lifestyle Beer No Guns Great Beaches BBQ's with Beer is we are Free to say what we think and can take the "piss out" of each other something the rest of the world just doesn't get

Once again thanks for pumping up our tyres
even tho we do a bloody good jobs of it ourselves Cheers grab a Beer & leave your money on the fridge lol

Anonymous said...

How about, in the start, writing that Australia was first originally home to the Aboriginal people.
I'm sick of reading texts on Australian 'history' and having the fact that we were here well before Australia was turned into a penal colony swept out of the way. People from the world over will read this, and although there are soo many other things wrong with this, at least start on the right footing.
Ridiculous.

Anonymous said...

I'm an awesome Aussie! I'm proud to be Australian and I love my home in Australia

Anonymous said...

am born & breed aussie fuck off all boat people
plus all fucking muslims can go to

Anonymous said...

LOL! To the majority of retarded fucks whom commented complaining about this...

"This fun facts about Australia page doesn't contain anything serious, just a bit of fun which, perhaps, might give our foreign visitors an insight into the rather 'different' Australian sense of humor. "

Get your heads out of your asses, for ONCE, and take a bit of humour the way it was intended. Jeez!

Anonymous said...

I should probably be asleep BUT well here I am not doing that... and you are all giving me blood pressure.

EVERY COUNTRY IN THE ENTIRE WORLD has it's good points and it's bad points BECAUSE *da dun daaaahh* EVERYBODY is different and thinks differently and were bought up differently in different life situations etc etc so on and so forth. NO COUNTRY IN ENTIRETY agrees on anything which means not everyone will be happy with how it's run BUT it's gotta happen because *gasp* LIFE GOES ON. NOT EVERYBODY will like the person who is appointed in one way or another to run the country BUT somebody has to do it and it is in no way an easy job - the weight of an entire country rests on your shoulders and you will NEVER make everybody happy... FUN.

There is nothing wrong with Australia, people have different perceptions. I am a damn proud Aussie though, I love it for everything even it's flaws - after all without them Australia wouldn't be Australia.

HERE ARE SOME REAL FACTS...

*The first prime minister of Australia was Sir Edmund Barton.
*Penicillin, extracted and refined by a team led by Sir Howard Florey, was trialled successfully on humans, and went into production in time to aid casualties of World War II.
*The Story of the Kelly Gang was the world’s first feature length film.
*The radio telescope in Parkes, New South Wales, received and relayed to the world the first pictures of the first moon landing.
*CSIRO and Note Printing Australia developed the world’s first polymer banknote made from tough flexible polypropylene plastics. These notes last longer and are more difficult to counterfeit than paper money.

Anonymous said...

Ayers rock isnt in New South Wales, its literally thousands of kms away from Sydney (New South Wales Capital) in a completely different state even.
That drunk driver wasnt at Ayers rock if he was in NSW - The closest thing to Ayers Rock in NSW is a fake "mock up" nowhere near real size near Karuah NSW (which is where the drunk must of been - nowhere else - Theres fuel and camping there he was probably looking to camp)

Anonymous said...

ahem America was the first British penal colony, im still amazed , like NO ONE from america knows that.
Its like you dont have it in your history books or something /giggle

they had to stop about 1780

Anonymous said...

julia gillkard is now the primeminister and the first women primeminister in australian history. you should put that in :) haha so true bout americans thinking its steve irwin haha and also you need to put some info on all the gorgeous models we have here. miranda ker, jenifer hawkens, elle mcpherson? :)

Invader_ZIM_FTW!!! said...

Oi, to the racist bastards who keep saying we're a bad country, then may i ask;
Why is our health care system free?
Why is our land so peaceful?(except at footy time Lol)
Why do we have freedom of speech?
Our country is fantastic, mate, so get get off your high horses, our country is wonderful, beautiful.
"Australians all let us rejoice
For we are young and free
We've golden soil and wealth for toil,
Our home is girt by sea:
Our land abounds in nature's gifts
Of beauty rich and rare,
In history's page let every stage
Advance Australia fair,
In joyful strains then let us sing
Advance Australia fair.
Beneath our radiant Southern Cross,
We'll toil with hearts and hands,
To make this Commonwealth of ours
Renowned of all the lands,
For those who've come across the seas
We've boundless plains to share,
With courage let us all combine
To advance Australia fair.
In joyful strains then let us sing,
Advance Australia fair."

Anonymous said...

Guys come on, im born and bred Australian, this stuff is too funny, people mix up our accents, so what? There are way to many different types of accents, and if people say G'day mate etc. get over it, they're just being friendly, Australians are racist, most men only care about booze and this is actually pretty accurate of most of Australia. Take a joke people.

Tie Me Kangaroo Down Sport said...

Aussie! Aussie! Aussie! Oi! Oi! Oi!

Anonymous said...

Wanna know another fun fact about Australia?
Did you know most girls Aussie girls are total sluts and try-hards? True story :) How I know? Because I live there and where ever I go they're everywhere. Even some of the girls I know used to be shy and a lil' bit nerdy but now they've become total SLUTS :D

Dean said...

I totally agree with the comment above me...most Aussie girls ARE total sluts and that's why most guys would go for them because they're easy to get or are 'easy targets' which means they use them only to f*ck around with them and nothing else :)

Anonymous said...

someone said 'Australia don't make fun of themselves and have a laugh but they are ready to laugh at other countries', thats complete lie. Australia is one of the only places Ive seen where the people will easily make fun of themselves and their country and have a good laugh. i have not seen any other country Ive been to do this. Australia was a friendly place, and i would visit again and again.

Anonymous said...

Awkward moment when people from around the world don't understand our humor, we know some of the text is true, thats because its a joke. i laughed at all of that part, even though i know its untrue. it even says at the start: This fun facts about Australia page doesn't contain anything serious, just a bit of fun which, perhaps, might give our foreign visitors an insight into the rather 'different' Australian sense of humor.

Anonymous said...

Love how he says us aussies are racist when hes ripping off a country

Anonymous said...

Australia is fine, every country has their pros and cons and none are perfect! Theres always a group of dickheads and there's always a group who just think they're not dickheads.

Anonymous said...

You know, I love this article. I'm Australian and some of these comments are actually as hilarious as the text (especially that one about it being racist to say 'G'day' and 'mate'...ummmm, is it racist if I say something like 'howdy' then?...

However, I was very disappointed to the lack of mention of drop bears and hoopsnakes. Not to mention, our deadly species and how we're so adjusted to drought we can survive weeks without water...

Oh, and Steve Irwin was Prime Minister at one point in time....

(N.B. Prime example of Aussie humour...saying something and meaning another entirely. Think sarcasm but said with straight face...)

Thank you for this article!

Anonymous said...

We as Australians know it to be a joke, but the rest of the world don't. As to being lazy and a crap government everywhere in the world was crying about the economic down turn in the USA, Canada etc. In Australia we were saying economic down turn, what the heck are they talking about... because of our government we didn't suffer at all. Oh and being lazy is worldwide.

David said...

"You left out that Ausdtralia is an Amercian clone, and full of racist biggots, who think Boat people are going to invade them anytime soon.

Australia, has no manufacturing industry, it was given to China so the CEO and executives can make more money for themselves.

Australia is firmly controlled, owned and operated by American interest.

We have one of the worlds biggest most corrupt, useless governments on the planet.

Australia is a nanny state, were the Government rules on everything. It has invaded all aspects of private life.

Australian Police have some of the worlds most oppressive powers, yet they remain one of the most incompetent and corrupt Police forces in the world.

Australia is the ONLY 1st world country to have an actuall "LIVE", ongoing Military intervention on it's own people. It has an active Military intervention on it's indigenous peoples.

It was done to free up the legislation that stopped Rio Tinto and BHP from mining certain areas of Australia.

Australia is a country of greedy, fat, car obsessed, selfish people. That is what it has become under the influence of American policy and pro-conservative think-tanks, like the "Australia Institute".

WHilst Australia remians one of the richest countries on Earth, due to it's vast natural resources. It's Education, Public Transport, Public Infrastructure is in tatters.

This is due to the direct influence of American style corporate policy and ideology, designed to strip away the wealth of the people and give it to the controlling fat cat's.

Even thou it is sooooooo rich it's beyond comprehension.... A recent social study, suggesteted, that Australian workers are amongst the world's most exploited and ripped off.

It showed how in the last 15 years, Australian workers, are working longer hours for less money and more credit debt.

It showed our social fabric was breaking up due to the stress and extra hours required to kept on top of interest debt.

Australian Media is controlled by 2 individuals. Making the Australian media, one of the most lackluster, subservient media services any were in the world today.

Australia has become a land of oppression, fear and loathing."

come out to the country and say that stuff some we will have a laugh about some we will give you a broken nose.

"Australia - If you dont like it...fuck off."

so true i said that to an American student at my school because he said Australia has to many fly's there was only one fly.

"Australia has become a land of oppression, fear and loathing" Damn right...

Australia is a filthy country run by fags and dykes. It has corrupt and complicated law enforcement and banking systems based on purposes of ripping people off.
continues next post because to long

Anonymous said...

Australia is the bests, my son born there, he is half aussie half mexican!!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

I honestly don't understand why so many people are hating on Australia. I'm an asian who's lived here my entire life, and I can say for a fact that I have never experienced any racist behaviour. That's not to say that there isn't any racism, but I think that there's less and less racism in Australia as new generations embrace equality and mutual respect. In addition, apart from Aborigines, Australians are all migrants, and come from all over the world, be they western countries, african, asian, middle eastern. Because of this I think that a majority of Australians accept each other. I get really annoyed when I read comments by some of the so called australians who posted racism comments about boat people and muslims, but majority of australian's don't share these views.

And what's everyone's problem with our political system? I agree that at the moment it may not be the prettiest sight, but it is still a democracy. The closest thing to a dictatorship? Hardly. We elect members of the parliament to represent us for their term, and when this term is up, if we didn't like the job they were doing we just elect someone else. It's basically the same system as any other democratic country. Just as laughable are the claims that our government is corrupt. Do you honestly think that the government can afford to be corrupt with the opposition party and the media watching their every move. Some people might claim that the Slipper incident proves that corruption is going on, but the fact that the issue has been brought to light and is being looked into shows that there is accountability and that abuse of power is not just being swept under the rug.

And all this stuff about Australian girls being sluts and try-hards really really pisses me off. You see sluts everywhere? If you just see them, how do you know that they're sluts? Obviously they'll wear certain clothes that are in fashion, but that doesn't automatically mean they sleep around. And also, what's wrong with being a slut? There's nothing wrong with being a try-hard either. It just means that they're doing their best to be liked. You can't just judge people by their appearances and automatically classify them as sluts or try-hards.

So yeah, finished my rant. But anyway, reading all the comments, us Aussies may seem a little touchy, but we just tend to get really angry when people just insult our country with biased opinions and made up facts. Australia's a truly great place, and we're all proud to be Australian. We may be best known for our laid back attitude, but above all we're also loyal and will defend the things we love, whether they be our friends, our family, or our country.

Anonymous said...

Racism, corruption, abuse of minorities... Everything's there. http://1ftup.blogspot.com.au/
Judges? Insurance companies? God forbid. They would kill without thinking. Au was established to be a prison; 250 years later its still a prison.

Anonymous said...

I cant get over the amout of badmouthing australia seems to be getting, firstly i realy took huge offence to the comment that Australian women are sluts, Im an australian woman and im most definitely not a slut, secondly the comments about australia being raceist, i had to laugh so hard at that, we are a realy multicultural country, we embrace all sorts of people no mater where they come from or what they believe in, if anyones raceist its the people who come into australia and try to push their ideals and their own beliefs on us and have no regard for the australian way of life and the australian way of culture, and sorry but its those ones that create the fuss and tend to be crying over how raceist australia is just because we dont have the same beliefs as you.

If you dont like australia, no ones makeing you come here or stay, get lost and stop badmouthing us or learn to be open minded and accepting of our culture. Australia is an awesome place, full of alot of genuine great people and has a wonderful culture, personaly im proud of my country and the advantages that come to liveing in it, after all if you think about it, it cant be to bad considering all the indians, asians and other nationalities that are moveing here, if their country was better why would they even leave in the first place?

<3<3<3 Australia!

Anonymous said...

Please, I'm an Indian and technically it is a part of India

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